Ranking 10 approaches to Akron's offensive coordinator promotion

The Akron Zips became the talk of the college football world on Tuesday, Aug. 4, by announcing a one-of-a-kind promotion.

Akron is letting one season ticket holder serve as the offensive coordinator and script the opening drive for the Sept. 12 home opener vs. FCS foe Robert Morris. A random drawing among season ticket holders will be conducted Aug. 19 to select the program's next temporary offensive coordinator.

Of course, the winner of the drawing isn't allowed to go fully rogue. Instead, this newly-appointed coordinator will work alongside head coach and offensive play-caller Joe Moorhead to run the offense, so any hope of convincing the 11 players on the field to replicate the Indianapolis Colts' infamous 2015 fake punt can be thrown out the window.

The promotion did exactly what it was designed to do.

It garnered thousands of retweets and likes on Twitter, with people from around the country posting screenshots of their 2026 Akron season ticket purchases, which start at $75 on the team's website. And most importantly, Robert Morris is an opponent the Zips feel comfortable attacking with a fan-scripted drive. Akron defeated its FCS opponent (Duquesne) 51-7 last year, while Robert Morris finished 2-8 against teams at the FCS level. Lastly, it will draw many more eyeballs to Akron football, especially the opening drive of the Zips' Week 2 contest which kicks off Sept. 12 at 3:30 p.m. ET.

Coach Moorhead will have the final approval of each play call, but here are 10 creative approaches to the situation, ranked from most disastrous to most effective (note, let security drag you out of InfoCision Stadium before you ever elect to punt):

10) Pooch punt on 1st and 10

Send out the offense and immediately make starting quarterback Reese Poffenbarger test out his pooch punting ability. Then walk back up to your seat in section 506 and enjoy the rest of the game with a chili cheese dog. Pros: you build confidence in the defense, letting them know you have full faith in them to get a stop. Cons: you waste a possession. It is quite a power move though.

9) 2015 Colts fake punt

Many people in Akron's mentions responded with this clip. Everyone wants to see this formation materialize into anything other than disaster. It won't.

I guess it's better than punting on your opening play, but no, you are probably not the coordinator that's going to fix the outcome of the 2015 Indianapolis Colts' fake punt heard 'round the world.

8) Set a new NCAA record

The longest field goal in college football history is 69 yards, authored in 1976 by Ove Johansson from Abilene Christian (a member of the NAIA, not the NCAA when it happened). The longest field goal in FBS/NCAA history is 67 yards, shared by several players including Steve Little (Arkansas, 1977) and Russell Erxleben (Texas, 1977).

Let Matthew Schramm forever engrave his name in the record books. As a redshirt freshman, Schramm connected on 12-of-13 field goals, sinking a long of 48. He never attempted anything from 50+, but this game presents the opportunity for him to drain a record 70-yard field goal. The approach here is to drive exactly to your own 47-yard line, ask Schramm which hash he prefers, and tell him to let it rip from 70. Then in your brief time as offensive coordinator, you can be responsible for an NCAA record.

7) Fake field goal/punt on 2nd down

What's better than sending the offense to do a special teams task? Sending the special teams to do an offensive task, of course. If you ever played one of the old NCAA games on PlayStation 2 and hit the "Ask Coach" feature, Lee Corso would sometimes recommend fake field goals and fake punts on 2nd and 8 situations for some reason. Here's a golden opportunity to test it out. And it's important to understand that Akron's punters averaged 16 yards per rushing attempt a season ago.

And if a fake field goal/punt picks up a first down, just keep the unit on the field. Defenses don't know how to adjust to this unorthodox strategy, even at the NFL level.

6) Put a lineman at running back

Every lineman's dream is to scoop up a fumble and pretend they're prime Barry Sanders. So why not let a lineman carry the ball without involving the fumble? See if Robert Morris can successfully tackle him on a recurring basis. Akron already has a considerable size advantage over Robert Morris. The Zips roster contains 16 players listed at 300 pounds or greater, while Robert Morris only has 4.

Premier running back candidates include 6'3", 345 pound lineman Jason Hoskins, or 6'7", 310 pound lineman Jonas Mann — the biggest players on the team. Give them their shine as skill position players and see how it works.

5) Spam jumbo package

Football is won in the trenches. So why not attempt a heavy goal line package from play one and assert your dominance up front? Throw extra linemen in and use a fullback. Sure, Akron lines up almost exclusively in shotgun under Moorhead, but that means Robert Morris will never see it coming.

Maybe spam the Philadelphia Eagles' tush push the whole way down the field until they stop it. Or fullback dive until your time is up. This is the type of smash mouth, physical football Bronko Nagurski probably envisioned we'd be playing in 2026.

4) Run a 2-QB system

You can throw a serious wrench in the defense by trotting out two quarterbacks on every play, giving your offense multiple hubs for distribution. Line up QB2 Brayden Roggow under center on every play, and have QB1 Reese Poffenbarger behind him in shotgun, similar to how Texas Tech used Behren Morton and Tyler Shough on a play in the 2022 Texas Bowl.

In this system, there are two quarterbacks who could field a snap on any play — one under center and one in shotgun — and you could add another wrinkle with the occasional shotgun snap to the running back. The options are endless.

3) Diversify your portfolio

1st and 10, come out in a flexbone formation and run the triple option. Maybe gain a couple yards through star running back Jordan Gant. Perhaps try it again on second down. Then, go tempo, no substitutions, and immediately audible to a spread, trips right formation and run four verticals. Have Reese Poffenbarger launch a 70-yard touchdown to Marcel Williams.

The dichotomy might be too significant for a defense to adjust in time. Those three plays could get you to the end zone.

2) Make a lineman do a cartwheel

Ohio attempted this in 2019, and it is a piece of MACtion lore. The Bobcats instructed 6'3", 300-pound offensive tackle Hagen Meservy to split out toward the boundary and draw attention to himself. Marshall ran a similar play that season except had its lineman doing jumping jacks and turned it into a 22-yard touchdown. Meservy one-upped the athletic ability with a cartwheel and Ohio picked up 25 yards on the trick play.

As offensive coordinator, it is essential to consult with Moorhead before the game and ensure at least one lineman can do a cartwheel. Or even better, a backflip.

1) Good ol'-fashioned trickery

Flea-flicker? Hook and ladder? Philly special? Statue of Liberty? How about a fake spike? Maybe combine them all into one drive. These are some of the oldest tricks in the book, and they've stood the test of time because they've proven to be effective.

So just throw out every trick in the book on the opening drive until that inevitable touchdown is scored. And if you dial up a trick that's effective enough, you may not need more than 1-2 plays.

And most importantly, if you script a touchdown drive, you should kindly tell Coach Moorhead you will not relinquish the headset for the remainder of the game. You earned your position on staff.

Have any other unique approaches while wearing the Akron offensive coordinator headset? Feel free to drop them in the comments.